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The Random Thread

General discussions about nothing in particular
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nikkai
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One for the doggy people

Post by nikkai » Wed Aug 26, 2015 5:00 pm

Latest post of the previous page:

A little girl asks her mum, 'Mum, can I take the dog for a walk around the block?' Her mum replies 'No, because she is on heat.' 'What does that mean?' asked the child. 'Go and ask your father. I think he's in the garage.' The little girl goes out to the garage and says, 'Dad, can I take Lulu for a walk around the block? I asked Mum, but she said the dog was on the heat, and to come ask you.' ... He took a rag, soaked it in petrol, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said 'Ok, you can go now, but keep Lulu on the leash and only go one time around the block The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash.. Surprised, Dad asked, 'Where's Lulu?'


You'll love this!!!!!!!!!)...............










The little girl said, 'She ran out of petrol about halfway round the block, so another dog is pushing her home.
The challenge is not to manage time, but to manage ourselves.
Steven Covey

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Suffolkboy
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Re: My New Car

Post by Suffolkboy » Wed Aug 26, 2015 9:41 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Always be a first -rate version of yourself,
instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.” Pablo Picasso

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Mel
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by Mel » Thu Aug 27, 2015 5:14 am

boatbuilder wrote:Anybody fancy a tomato fight? :lol:
Your post reminds me of one of the 'best bad' movies I have seen Boatbuilder, 'Attack of the Killer Tomatoes' 8-)
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Suffolkboy
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by Suffolkboy » Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:07 pm

BETTE MIDLER LYRICS


Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
An endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
And you its only seed.

It's the heart afraid of breaking
That never learns to dance.
It's the dream afraid of waking
That never takes the chance.
It's the one who won't be taken,
Who cannot seem to give,
And the soul afraid of dyin'
That never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long,
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong,
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows
Lies the seed that with the sun's love
In the spring becomes the rose.
Always be a first -rate version of yourself,
instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.

“Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.” Pablo Picasso

Trigger
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by Trigger » Thu Dec 17, 2015 2:52 pm

A Prayer for the Stressed

Grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage
to change the things I cannot accept,
And the wisdom
to hide the bodies of those I had to kill today because they got on my nerves.

And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today,
as they may be connected to the feet I may have to kiss tomorrow.

Help me always to give 100% at work...
12% on Monday,
23% on Tuesday,
40% on Wednesday,
20% on Thursday
and 5% on Friday

And help me to remember...

When I'm having a bad day
and it seems that people are trying to wind me up,
it takes 42 muscles to frown,
28 to smile
and only 4 to extend my arm and smack someone in the mouth!
‘Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet’ - Professor Stephen Hawking

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frankiesays
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by frankiesays » Fri Dec 18, 2015 4:33 pm

funkychick wrote:well he says FB but I have my settings as 'friends only' and as he's not my'friend' and doesnt know my name unless he's been stalking me ..... I m not sure what he means??
I'd not been on the site for quite a while and am still catching up and just caught up with this thread which has become far more "sinister" by my absence ;-) I can assure you FC that just because we are not "friends" in Facebook the only other possibility for me recognising you on there is NOT that I'm stalking you. So an explanation is required which may be a bit long.

I spend a lot of time on the Pictures of Old Lowestoft FB page and other Lowestoft sites on there as I believe you do/did as well as I recognised your style of writing and you also mentioned a topic or two that we had discussed on here - my memory is not so good but one of those subjects may have been "The Staniel" which was beached at Pakefield in the 50's. Your posts on there show your profile picture and your name. Putting two and two together I thought I would confirm whether it was you or not by clicking on your name on one of your posts. It took me to your FB page and among the pictures on that page was the exact one which you had posted on here a few days previously - I believe of your grand-daughter, possibly on the beach? Can't remember now. I don't know you other than on here so with my curiosity satisfied that was it. However, when you posted that your page on FB was private (or words to that effect) I thought I should point out to you that it was not the case. I did not want to post any "proof" at the time as you are anonymous on here as most local people are and I can see why anybody would want to be when you are commenting on local matters that may raise a few local hackles - I have no need to be anonymous as I live 350 miles away and am not likely to be accosted for any views I express which may have upset somebody.

I noticed recently that you are one of the admin team on a FB photo page and I ran a quick search on FB today of your name (I'm no FB expert) and can now find no trace of you other than a mention that you were recently in The Lowestoft Journal for some excellent work you have done recently. I am assuming therefore that you have amended your privacy settings or the fault that allowed me to see your page is now corrected. Your Google FB entry came up with your page but with nothing now visible to "non friends".

It just goes to show the personal info which can be obtained on t'internet without really trying. I have no interest in your personal affairs and enjoy our exchanges on here as I do with all the other members but with one minute of effort on Google I know your name, age, the road you live in and two of your phone numbers. If you Google your name yourself you will see that you come up in most of the first ten entries which include a picture, a few sites you have participated in and some letters you have written to various papers. Me on the other hand, can only be found by typing in my name and a previous employer and then I'm well down the list - definitely not as famous as you :-(
It's grim up North...

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Re: The Random Thread

Post by Trigger » Wed Mar 22, 2017 3:56 pm

CONFUCIUS NEARLY SAID

Man who wants pretty nurse must be patient.
Passionate kiss, like spider web, leads to undoing of fly.
Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent.
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg will not find nuts.
Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.
Man who runs in front of car gets tired. Man who runs behind car gets exhausted.
Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.
War does not determine who is right It determines who is left.
Man who fight with wife all day get no peace at night.
It takes many nails to build a crib but only one screw to fill it.
Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.
Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.
Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Finally CONFUCIUS DID SAY. . ...
A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!
‘Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet’ - Professor Stephen Hawking

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boatbuilder
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by boatbuilder » Wed Jun 28, 2017 10:36 pm

The 2017-19 Children's Laureate is a lady named .... Lauren Child. How strange is that? :think:
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You forget what you want to remember and remember what you would prefer to forget

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Re: The Random Thread

Post by boatbuilder » Thu Aug 03, 2017 10:47 pm

I found this in an old folder from 2012 which I think was first posted by someone on Lowestoft Online around that time, if anyone remembers it.

Read the text at the top of the image below then do exactly as it says.
Nose2.jpg
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by boatbuilder » Thu Aug 24, 2017 8:46 pm

This was linked to in an email I received today.

Beware of double meanings

A recent case in Suffolk highlighted the complexity of ensuring that road signs are fit for purpose. Children and those driving on the UK’s roads while visiting from abroad reported confusion and consternation over a sign reading ‘Cats Eyes Removed.’
To those who’ve learned to drive in the UK, the sign’s temporary presence (in combination with the resurfacing work that was taking place) was nothing remarkable – it merely warned that the usual reflective markers in the centre of the road would not be visible for a while. However, several of those who saw the sign and hadn’t learned to drive in the UK were shocked by the blatant boast of animal cruelty.
People who were distressed by the sign included an American tourist, who had to do a double take of the sign in question, then ask a local about the meaning of it, and a five-year-old girl who got upset about the welfare of her pet cat.

There is some other interesting reading in the same link: https://www.petrolprices.com/news/beware-road-signs/
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Mel
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by Mel » Fri Aug 25, 2017 7:18 am

boatbuilder wrote:A recent case in Suffolk highlighted the complexity of ensuring that road signs are fit for purpose.
I was cycling through Somerleyton a couple of weeks ago and there was a sign 'Beware Road Studs Removed' and sussed out they meant 'Cat's Eyes', how ridiculous...I don't expect I will be able to buy a dog's leg paintbrush soon as that name might upset someone!! :)
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boatbuilder
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by boatbuilder » Sat Aug 26, 2017 3:47 pm

I came across some interesting illusions online yesterday. Here are three of them (details below the pictures) - Inspect closely:
Is the square growing larger?
Is the square growing larger?
Growing Larger.JPG (70.14 KiB) Viewed 929 times
Rabbit or Duck?
Rabbit or Duck?
Rabbit or Duck.JPG (47.6 KiB) Viewed 929 times
She's prettier upside down.
She's prettier upside down.
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by boatbuilder » Sat Feb 17, 2018 9:23 pm

I came across this the other day and thought it might raise a few smiles. :D

Are these the worst cycle lanes ever built?
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by boatbuilder » Mon Feb 26, 2018 1:24 pm

I was just reading a news article about the BBC presenter Steph McGovern and clicked on a 'Tweet' in the article to enable me read something she had attached as an image on her Twitter page.

After I had read it I just happened to scroll down through her tweets and came across this one by somebody else which she had retweeted and which I thought amusing enough to 'retweet' here. :lol:
Tweet.JPG
Tweet.JPG (35.58 KiB) Viewed 912 times
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Trigger
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Re: The Random Thread

Post by Trigger » Thu Apr 19, 2018 4:16 pm

Shakespeare – a correction. Prior to the Battle of Bosworth in 1485, Richard III had ordered a battalion of hard-hitting Vikings to assist with his campaign. Sadly, on the day, they failed to arrive. Consequently, contrary to popular belief, Richard’s final cry was: “A Norse, a Norse¸ my kingdom for a Norse”! :roll:
‘Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet’ - Professor Stephen Hawking

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Re: The Random Thread

Post by boatbuilder » Tue Apr 24, 2018 7:27 pm

Just happened to come across this job advert on the LinkedIn website and had to smile when I saw the location and the job title. :D
SkyJob.JPG
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